Going Out To Eat Manifesto

Kids are hungry.  They are screaming in the back of the car.  They are whining like there is no tomorrow.  

On one hand, you know that the food you make at home, mostly, is better than the food kids get at restaurants.  The kids’ menu is often the same: pizza, nuggets, spaghetti.  On the other hand, time is getting late.  If there is anything worse than a tired and crabby child, it is a hungry, tired, and crabby child.  This piece will lay out what to consider when deciding whether or not to go out to eat.

Is there any research on this topic?  There is a lot on childhood nutrition.  I could not find anything on how often a family should go out or what kind of place of if it is important to gain manners from going out to eat.  

We'll just start with manners. All parents want their kids to have them.

So, yes, kids need manners.  They can learn those when a family goes out to eat, especially at a sit down restaurant.  Taking children out to eat seems more like a test than a method of teaching.  What matters is having kids practice manners every time they eat.  Waiting for food, eating neatly, cleaning up, and staying at the table are a few ones I like a lot.  This is an interesting article about how teaching children manners teaches them empathy.  That seems a little extreme.  Bottom line: taking kids out to eat does allow you to see how your work at home is going.  It doesn’t seem like a method, unless you are going out very frequently.

Fast food is bad for you. Gross.  Stomach disturbing.  Yet, kids love it.  Adults love it.  I try to hit delis and not fried food as much as possible.  I will admit, at least once every two weeks, Max, Will, and Chloe eat fast food.  It is a product of our overscheduled lives.  I would recommend trying to eat at sit-down restaurants as much as possible.

If you know how to follow directions, you can make a good meal at home (at half or a third of the cost).  Let’s say you’re averse or not skilled at following directions.  Here is my top five for those who struggle with cooking: spaghetti, tacos, sloppy joes, philly steak, and grilling (anything).  Even at nicer restaurants, the food quality will be lower than what you get at home because the restaurant has to pay people and also pay rent.

There also is the pampering factor of going out to eat.  I’ve only really experienced that since my kids were

4.  Up until then, I thought I would get to not cook or clean up, but the absence of those responsibilities was replaced by having to entertain the kids, take them to the bathroom, and try to keep them from running around the restaurant.  I guess it is a little better than cooking and cleaning up, but not by much.

It seems like going out to fast food is warranted when you’re traveling (perhaps hitting up one of those WTD with kids recommendations) and the kids are hungry.  When I plan a trip, I try to hit food that is different than what the kids have eaten.  For example, when we went to a museum in nearby Ann Arbor, I found a

place that sold Pho (Vietnamese chicken noodle soup) and stopped there on the way.  I cannot get motivated to drive 30 minutes just to eat.  But, to go to something fun and eat?  That I can drive to do.

There are a few places I almost always avoid: Chucky Cheese, Burger King, and Applebees.  This brings up a central truth: chains stink.  If one restaurant is all an owner has, he or she is likely to put his best effort into making everything there top notch.  I understand with franchises, some owners only have one.  I guess.  Because of circumstances, I occasionally break down and go to chains.  I find their food bland; their ambiance ambivalent; and the overall experience “meh.”  I try to avoid chains.

On the other hand, I can tell you this from experience, you don't want your kid to be sitting at a Taco Bell counter ordering a Tostada, hold the tomatoes, lettuce, and onions, or ordering a bean burrito, minus onions and sauce.  To get kids to be able to travel and work around the world, they have to be able to eat something more than a plain hamburger.

How often should a child go out to eat?  How often is too much?  It seems like it depends on the family’s lifestyle.  I try to eat at home as much as possible.  If the family is busy, it seems likely the family will eat out more.  My recommendation is try to make going out to eat intentional, so you stay at non-chain, fairly inexpensive, away from home restaurants.  These thoughts are foundational to all my reviews, which you will notice rarely are about restaurants in the town where I live.